Today has been a mix of emotion for me. I appreciate all of your comments it lifts my spirits and helps me to press on. We went to the eye dr this am and had Caroline's eyes dilated to check for ROP - this is an eye condition that causes preemies to go blind and have cataracts. We also checked for tear ducts and that things were going well there. All was well at the eye dr. No ROP and she does have tear ducts that seem to work!!!!
Carley is settling down and allowing others to do for her cheerfully now rather than mommy. It is hard to not bathe her, lay beside her and hold her when she asks to be held. She is continuing to go to her MMO and is doing great there too!
We also had a home visit from a neonatal NICU nurse and these visits have been approved and covered by insurance for the next 3-4 weeks. It is just another way to check on her growth and progress and keep us from running back to the pediatrician every week. We discovered she has a newborn rash that should subside in a week. It is not treatable and is not contagious or necessarily caused by anything. This was a comfort. We do have a genetics appt and hope all is truly well. We hope we have received honest and true results thus far. We do not know if further testing will result from this visit on Monday. We also weighed and measured Caroline. She is 4.1 and I thought this was good. They told us we need to feed her more food in quantity and keep measuring everything and to now keep a record of ounces pees and poops. No one has told us this before - nor has anyone told me to give more formula than breast milk. So I have been pumping like crazy and getting 2-3 full feedings a day. However, now we are to give a certain ratio of each. It is time consuming and frustrating to not know exactly what to do and know all of the details at one time. Things by far have been good, but now we are receiving details. We measured 16 1/3 at birth at CMC. At Prov. Peds we measured 17". I questioned Cam and I said can she grow that fast - that is great! Well we discovered her legs are two different lengths. Why has no one figured this out between Nicu, neonatalogists, and pediatrician visits?
I was angry and discovered it together along with the nurse. Her comments were something is going on and Dr. Spence is wonderful and will have some answers for you on Monday. I am not so sure we will have answers. I am also not so sure I am ready to receive answers. Please pray for me to have wisdom to discern what is true and what I should do as a mom. Sometimes we feel drs. are hem hawing around to make sure we are not freaking out or maybe they really do not know what is wrong! We do know babies born breach can have hip dysplasia and need a brace for six weeks. It is quite obvious to me we will need this or more. Her legs are at least 1-1/2 inch difference. Sorry for the details , but thought we may need some more specific needs lifted above to our Heavenly Father inspite of my human comprehension. We will keep you all posted and will post again Thur/Fri after two more appt.
9 comments:
Hi Kim, Cameron, Carly & Caroline~
First, congratulations on your precious, BEAUTIFUL baby girl! Wow, she is so pretty, I love all of her dark hair! And I agree with the previous poster, Kim, you look fabulous, too! The B&W pictures are adorable!
I have been thinking of & praying for you all & wanted to see how you all are doing, so Katie gave me the link to your blog. I'll look forward to keeping updated here.
I'll also call you sometime this week as I'd like to drop a little something by your house sometime...
I am glad that God is in control and I will pray that he will wrap you in His perfect peace & comfort!
Isaiah 55:8-13
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth,so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree, and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD's renown, for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed."
Much love~
Melanie for the Howards
Mom and Dad Abbott,
Hang in there - just know that you are doing a great job with Caroline and with Carley. We all know that love can work miracles. The eye doctor news is very positive, and many, many things that seem so major to us parents can be helped with medical science. Just remember - One day at a time, celebrate each milestone, keep your faith, and repeat ths saying "God will not give me anything so difficult today that He and I together cannot handle".
Love and prayers,
Peggy and Pete
"God will make a way
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way He will make a way"
Dear Kim & Cameron:
I'm singing this song prayerfully this morning for the two of you and your precious girls! So please know when you're exhausted from lack of sleep and trying to make sense of it all, people who love you are praying and FOREVER GOD IS FAITHFUL -- HE IS GOOD ALL THE TIME!
Wish I lived close by to take rockin' chair duty or play tea party dress-up with Carley! :)
Love,
Cathy (& the Brown Boyz)
Kimberly,
I know all the appointments and the push and pull of good news and undiscovered surprises is exhausting. You have been a trooper and have been handling everything so graciously.
You are a wonderful mother and I know your ever growing love for Caroline will help sustain her.
We were so glad to spend some time with all of you.
Love,
Kelly
kim, your honesty is humbling. thanks for being so real and transparent, all so that the most precious needs of your child can be taken to the throne of God. I can't understand or grasp how frustrating and confusing it all must be for you, but I just continue to pray...that's what i know I can do. i love you.
Kim,
Your words brought tears to my eyes because all these questions and concerns are difficult, scary, keep changing and seem overwhelming. What is completely obvious is how much you love both your daughters. No matter what. No matter appts or not, results or not, treatment or not - you love this beautiful little Caroline and that will get you through each day. Caroline is a lucky lucky baby to have you as her mom. You are doing all that you can, keep going. And if you need ANYTHING, you send out word. From here, I can have pizza delivered to your house so that you and Cameron don't have to worry about dinner and just snuggle as a family! Vista can do that! You are a strong woman and even on the toughest days, that strength is still in there.
Melissa
Kim,
Jennifer Bates sent me an email and your blog link. I know what you are going through with all of the doc visits and the not knowing. I had twin boys 2 years ago born at 29 weeks. Kyle was 2 lbs and Kade was 3 lbs. they were in the hospital for 71 and 90 days. I had Kendall at home who was 21 months at the time. God is so faithful. We were told along the way that they would probably have blindness, cataracts, autism, and cerebral palsy, be developmentally, physically, and mentally delayed. When the NICU docs see them now they shake their heads and say that there is no explanation for the fact that they are where they should be if they were born full term!! God is our explanation!! He is faithful and will not leave you alone in this. Know that we feel your heart aches and are praying for you.
This was the verse we took as our motto!
James 1:2-4
Whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed you will be strong in character and ready for anything!!
Much love,
Ginger (Davis)Parks
http://www.theparks-partyinabox.blogspot.com/
I'm just checking in tonight and glad to know you are all home and doing well. Caroline seems to be thriving with Mom, Dad and Big Sis!
As for you, Kim, it just doesn't seem fair that we face these challenges while also coping with new-mom-hormones! This may seem like a weird thing to share, but I'm up in the middle of the night because I felt prompted to type up some of my testimony from recent years. One passage that came to me as I lay in the hospital was from Romans 8:26: "We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." As we are all unsure precisely how to pray just now, He is doing that for your family. Isn't that an awesome truth?
I love you all and continue to pray that "the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Phil. 4:7)
Jenn
Kim,
When we spoke the other day and you told me about all the appointments for this week I knew that it was going to be a hard week. I am so gratefull that her eye appointment went well! What a blessing. I want you to know that my heart goes out to you during this difficult time of unanswered questions and new changes with Caroline. I know it has been hard on you going from positive and answered prayers to the uncertain new challenges that you are facing. I will continue to be a prayer warrior for your family and Caroline. I know that God has a plan for you and I know that he will not leave you during this time but will carry you through. You are a wonderful mother, I love you very much. Mimi
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